Gilbert: Did you ever see a beached whale on television?
Becky: Yeah.
Gilbert: Yeah. That's her. That's my mom. 

Mainstream, superficial and retarded post

There's that scenario that you see in movies which also happens all the time in real life. It does, hell, it even happened to me so I would know. It's that thing when you meet someone, this wonderful person, smart, funny, kind, good-looking, all over just wonderful, you fall completely flat for them and then of course - they're gay. You hear girls complain about it all the time, especially when they've found some actor or model or the like, that the perfect man is always gay. Obviously though, because the perfect man is always that sensitive, wobbly, soft guy with overly cared-for hair and a love for animals. Girly stuff. Girls want girly men. All those girls that have that close gay friend, they all secretly want him. Probably because they can't have him. And if you haven't got a friend who's recently posted a Facebook status complaining about the perfect man being gay, you've surely seen it in the movies - it's a cliché. But it's a cliché that is just as lame when it happens in real life and that's why it lives. What came to mind today though was: I wonder if it's sometimes the other way around too? Do men ever meet the perfect woman and then she turns out to be a lesbian? The scenario seems far less likely but nonetheless possible and that's when I thought: I wonder if I have ever been that girl. Not at all that I think of myself as the perfect woman, far from, but seeing as I have almost exclusively male friends who enjoy my company when doing and talking about boyish things (video games, mostly), might one of them ever have thought "This girl has all the same interests as me, same sense of humor, so on so forth" (let's leave out the part about being good looking), but then having been smacked in the face with "oh but of course she's a lesbian". Realistically it's not completely unlikely. And I have had boyfriends so it's not like guys have been totally ignorant to the possibility of me being their girlfriend. At least not those guys. It's not that it really matters, it was just something that crossed my mind the other day and I felt like putting it into words. Just a thought. A self-centered little thought. A what if. I'll never know. 

Can I stay with you forever?

Yesterday I had agreed to meet up with my mother at the grocery store because she finds it unfair if she has to both go grocery shopping and cook alone - which is fair enough. She had been up working out as she does a few times a week and I just came home from work, so we had agreed to just meet at the store. My flag hung a little low that day, there was nothing wrong in particular, I just wasn't at the top of my game. She had obviously arrived before me and I knew she'd be inside already. She's not at all had to spot, sticking up between the aisles with her blonde hair. I saw her from the fruits and vegetables section through the window the separates the cool area from the rest of the store and it seemed odd to me that I waved at her but she didn't wave back, it just looked like she smiled faintly at me. I turned a corner and headed down the aisle of which she stood in the other end and as I approached her, I noticed that her face was somewhat different than usual. Perhaps the colour was a bit off its regular... but suddenly I was close enough to see that her eyes were filled with tears that began rolling down her face as she opened her arms and pulled me into one of those warm, tight hugs you only rarely get. "I was suddenly just so happy to see you. I'm just so happy you're my daughter" she mumbled at me. She had caught me completely off guard in the middle of the grocery store, so off guard that even though I wanted to say something nice, it came out as "Awh mom, stop that..." in a regretfully condescendingly pathetic kind of way. It was just so... out of nowhere. I'll have to remember to tell her that I love her someday soon.