If we stop talking about it, it's gonna go away by itself. We tried everything we could think of that could possibly help and so... is it gone now? Not really no, so what are you gonna do to help me now? Oh nothing? Y'know... that's... I mean.. c'mon.. you even took my pills away, you didn't have to do that. So what if they didn't help, it makes a difference that they're gone. I need just a little courage to say what I've been waiting and waiting to say, what's I've been wanting to force myself into but never dared or maybe never cared enough. Or so it's gonna look like. Yes, again, another post without names or any nouns to reveal what the hell all this bull shit is supposed to mean, just empty complaints and emo blabber. HA. And here it came, tunnel vision. I've been hoping for it to show up for several days. Everything gets so small and distant. It feels like a little high, just a little one. The one that's nice to have just before you go to sleep; luckily it likes to show up whenever I'm tired. I'm zoning out. I just forgot everything there for a moment. But there it came rushing back. That sting in the chest. Group sessions, therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, green pills, red pills, hynosis, fresh air, a pad on the fucking head. Depression comes rushing back right into my chest. I would say it never left but hey. I claimed to be happy on a few occasions, didn't I. I won't deny that. I'll just... push it aside a little 'cause it doesn't count. But dude... I'm zoning out on a vision high. The sky is my screen is my limit. No period
